One of the biggest challenges of being human is being endued with a monkey mind.
No animal has one, no child has one, but as soon as we grow up and start becoming reasonable and serious and lose the connection with our soul, there it is.
Here are some of the things my Monkey Mind is telling me when it is at full speed: Be careful. Think every little aspect over once, or, better, twice. Control it. It has to be perfect. What if you fail? Nobody will love you, and you will lose everything.
You will live under a bridge. Or maybe you will even die.
Be sure to make no mistake. Better try to do what others expect from you. Never let go. Tense yourself as much as you can, so that nothing can hurt you and everything works out.
Imagine all the things that could happen in the future! What if this . . . ? And what if that . . . ? You are responsible that this stuff doesn't happen, so give more than your best. Think about all of your failures in the past! Do you want this to happen again?
You are only worthy and safe if you reach all of your goals.
Do you want to be a loser? Come on Verena, don’t relax, there is so much work and duty waiting for you . . . and so on, blah blah. The monkey mind never stops chatting.
Sometimes, I hear it louder; sometimes its negative messages fade in the distance. These are the moments when I feel pure bliss; when there is peace and acceptance for how things are in the here and now.
The Monkey Mind loves to wake me up at night in challenging times and to make me roll around in my bed like crazy, trying to find just a little bit of comfort. After one hour alone with it, I feel absolutely whacked and as if my life is a complete catastrophe.
It also loves to bombard me with its accusations and claims when someone in the outer world does this too, and I already feel weak and helpless.
Obviously, I am not alone with this. When I look around, I see and hear Monkey Minds everywhere. Our Monkey Minds seem to be the main reason why this beautiful planet has become such a crazy place.
I am still on my way to tame my Monkey Mind, but I have learned that there are some things it doesn’t like at all and that make it shut up:
- Deep breathing
- Mindful eating, walking, speaking, everything-ing…
- Nature, especially forests and the sea
- Body awareness
- Dancing or exercising until every body cell
is vibrating with energy
- Self-love, self-forgiveness and any form of self-care
- The radical acceptance of all feelings
- The embracing of my wounds and my vulnerability
- Unconditional love and compassion: giving and receiving
- Authentic and honest relationships
- Deep conversations with others
- Not being around people who tell me
the same shit as it does
- Being around people who tell me the tender opposite
- Reading books by people with a tamed Monkey Mind
- Connecting with the pure awareness of animals
- Laughter, playfulness, and fun
- A loving relationship with my inner child
- The integration of death as a natural part of life
- The integration of pain as a natural part of life
- The remembering of who I am: an immortal soul
who is ultimately safe
- And last but not least: the heart-connection with God, or however you call it: Love, the One, the Universe…
But the most important key to the taming of my Monkey Mind is to bestow it too with my unconditional love and compassion, to understand its fears and control mechanisms on a deeper level and to soothe it and rock it like a little child.
That’s what makes it crumple up, go quiet, and sit happy and satisfied with a yummy banana in its favorite corner, watching me surrender to the grace of my life.